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Accepting aging

Months away from turning 40, I must say that the real crisis of facing my own aging has already revealed itself and is now starting to lighten up in my mind and lifestyle.

The truth is that no one is prepared to, suddenly, feel that it has happened... that we have officially stopped being young, that our beauty has dissipated without us noticing it and in turn wrinkles have appeared and the tired look gained space, that we should consider what to wear and how to act according to our age. And, at least in my case, that's exactly how it happened, an impact, or rather an idea that took hold one day and made me look at myself very differently. After all, up until that point I was just a girl.

I'm sorry that, especially in today's society, aging is not seen in a different light. Everything tells us that we have to remain infinitely young and static. Obviously a nonsense that collides with the other part of society that tells us that we must constantly evolve.

On the other hand, in an era in which diversification and acceptance are so promoted, we continue to have messages in the areas of beauty, fashion and others under the motto anti-aging.

It is extremely difficult to accept our wrinkles when social media filters remove them, when the big stars seem to reverse any sign of the passage of time to become plastic dolls, when we look in the mirror and are completely formatted to see only the flaws. . And I say formatted because, unfortunately, everything around us teaches us to reject what is actually only natural.

I won't try to be a papist, nor hypocritical in order to say that I will never have botox or other aesthetic procedures, because I don't look at it with bad eyes. But I've been trying every day to fight the demons that arise and learn to like what seems to be so hated by society's beauty standards.

A very imperfect nose, a few more freckles, deep expression lines... All this is much more difficult for a woman, although it is also difficult for a man. All of this is even more painful if we don't have someone by our side to give us confidence and help us fight these demons. Something that fortunately I am immensely lucky to have.

As we enter 40 we feel a certain weight on our shoulders. In addition, we grieve. Grief because we realize that our childhood and youth are really over and there is nothing to bring them back. Grief for what we didn't do and didn't live. Grief because we fear the next twenty will pass even faster.

The truth is that in this process of acceptance we can feel alone. And sad. And discouraged. And that has a bearing on our emotional well-being.

The good news is that we eventually learn (or decide) to accept this passing of age with ease. And we learn (or decide) to look at ourselves differently. To look less critically and see the beauty in the imperfections and marks that time has given us. We accept maturity, the age, aging.

And it's only when we decide to accept our aging that we realize there's a whole new life to be lived. On our own terms.

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